Adam GiannelliAbout the Author:

Adam Giannelli is a person who stutters; the author of Tremulous Hinge (University of Iowa Press, 2017), winner of the Iowa Poetry Prize; and the translator of Diadem (BOA Editions, 2012), a selection of prose poems by Marosa di Giorgio. His writing has appeared in many newspapers and literary journals. He deeply values his involvement in stuttering communities, and recently lead a writing workshop at this year’s National Stuttering Association Conference.

Introduction

Language is a form of representation. Since words carry concepts, the words we use influence our ideas, and ultimately these ideas stick to bodies as they move through the world. “Stutterfied” is a response to the deficit language that surrounds stuttering. I noticed that many of the words we commonly use to refer to stuttering (“disfluency,” “disorder,” “impediment”) begin with prefixes that denote negation and lack. These prefixes, although small, are powerful, defining stuttering as the opposite of another primary term. I started collecting these words with prefixes, and then composed a response. 

To come up with new vocabulary for stuttering, I turned to the transformative power of metaphor. By seeing something in a new light, metaphor can offer an alternative to prevailing conceptions and express pride. The piecemeal nature of stuttering, for instance, is compared in the poem to the way the small colorful pieces of a “mosaic” combine to form a larger image. The references to the arts (“filigree,” “quartet”) imply that stuttering can be seen as aesthetically beautiful, and the comparisons to the natural world (“greenery,” “tendril”) show that stuttering is a natural thing.

“Blocks,” “repetitions,” and “prolongations,” since they don’t have prefixes, don’t entirely fit the pattern, but I wanted to show that those clinical terms feel rather neutral and cold when contrasted with more celebratory language. Of course, in everyday speech I say “blocks” regularly, and I still use some of the other words, such as “disfluency,” in the first line of each stanza. This existing language is hard to get away from, but recently I’ve been much more self-conscious about the words I use to discuss stuttering, trying, for instance, to avoid saying problem, as I did when growing up.  

While the title of the poem, a neologism, is not a metaphor, it’s in line with the poem’s process of coming up with new language for stuttering. It’s a portmanteau that combines stutter and stupefy (and perhaps defy is also in there). I think there’s something astonishing about stuttering, the way it pops up in conversation, and I also hope the poem turns some common notions about stuttering on their heads. 

Stutterfied

beneath disfluency
I say mosaic

beneath disorder
I say texture say my own species of sigh

beneath distortion
I say a gratuitous greenery 

beneath impediment
I say a ghostly percussion a soft marginalia

beneath impurities
I say the body as minute hand as calendar

beneath impairment
I say stuttered

beneath delay
I say migratory say cloud shift 

beneath deviation
I say filigree say the body as city lights as cinema

beneath deficiency
I say innocent

beneath abnormal
I say the air of elsewhere say bubbles and buoyant kernels

beneath aberration
I say a single commotion say quartet 

beneath abrasive
I say my own lunar surface 

beneath prolongation
I say prelude say like standing under a marquee 

beneath repetitions
I say erratic as freckles as rain against the window

beneath blocks
I say cliffhangers say steeped & slowly poured 

beneath unable
I say here harnessing a space

beneath untreated
I say attention say the breadcrumbs between us 

beneath unsung
I say here beside you say tendril

(First appeared in the Kenyon Review 41[6], 2019)

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Comments

Stutterfied – Adam Giannelli — 14 Comments

  1. Wow Adam!
    I vacillated between chills and smiles while reading your introduction and poem. I am a firm believer that language impacts our thoughts and emotions. I have worked in the field for over 40 years and I have grown to hate/worry about words like disfluency and disorder. I have the same reaction to you about the negative language linked to stuttering and you express a solution in the most beautiful way….cliffhanger may be my favorite!
    Thank you for sharing your brilliant artistic talent with us!

    • Thanks, Rita! I appreciate your sensitivity to language. It’s such a slippery medium. And I love that you took time to find a favorite moment. “Cliffhanger” is about the suspense that stuttering can inject into a conversation. Blocks aren’t just silences; they are silences filled with anticipation.

  2. This is a beautiful, chilling poem!

    Yes! Our use of language; the vocabulary we choose, the intonation, the pitch, everything impacts the mental connections we make. Simply labelling stuttering as an impairment, disorder, disability, anything of that nature, automatically manifests as a negative mental representation. Language has way more of an impact on our emotional states than so many people realize. I think it is so important to consistently check ourselves with the verbiage we as a society use to describe different things.

    I sincerely love how you have not just neutralized aspects of stuttering, but added a level of beauty to it. “beneath impairment; I stay stuttered,” that phrase stuck with me the most. Thank you for bringing attention to this in such a profound way.

  3. Thanks so much for your careful attention to this poem! And for taking the time to focus on a particular phrase. I think often the best approach for describing disabilities is to be direct, which is why I wrote “stuttered.” I also don’t think “stutter” should be verboten. I spent much of my childhood not only avoiding stuttering but also the word “stutter.” I wanted to reclaim it here. Of course, the metaphors in much of the poem are indirect and might sound odd in a different context, but as you note I also wanted to show the beauty of stuttering.

  4. Hi Adam,

    This is such a meaningful way to look at stuttering, reframing from a deficit perspective to a difference perspective. How we use language greatly conveys how stuttering is perceived.
    To a person that does not stutter, and general society as a whole, stuttering seems abnormal, defective, something that needs to be fixed. Words create that.

    Your words are a challenge to put away the false assumptions and just see a person who stutters as a person. Unfortunately we have a long way to go. Even within the stuttering community, there is so much stigma – many internalize the public stigma and believe the myths about themselves.

    Not only do we need truthful representation in the media, we need it in our own community.

    Pam

    • Hi Pam! Thanks for reading. Yes, “fixed” is another word that bothers me. And I think “myth” is a great word to describe the misconceptions about stuttering. Some representations really are just myths. One of the wonderful things about poetry is that it has allowed me to describe myself in my own words. By the way, I was listening to your podcast the other day, and you’re such a great listener!

  5. Hi Adam,
    Thank you so much for sharing this expression of yourself. I love the way you use imagery of beautiful things to make your point. I also deeply appreciate that you are bringing attention to the weight that our words carry, especially around such a personal topic. I can only imagine the difference that would be made if everyone was as mindful of the way they described and spoke about stuttering. As a student who is currently studying stuttering, I have learned that many SLPs are afraid of treating PWS. What advice would you give to clinicians who may be hesitant to take a client who is a PWS? Thanks!

    • Thanks for your careful attention to my words (and words in general). And great question! Stuttering is complicated and highly variable, but there are a lot of great resources out there about stuttering, including this site. It’s difficult to move through the world with a difference, and people who stutter need allies. Keep reading and best of luck with your studies!

  6. Hello Adam
    Thank you so much for sharing this poem with us and your insights! I agree that by people labelling stuttering as an impairment, disorder, disability makes it a bad/negative representation. What advice would you give a future SLP when he or she is working with a person who stutters.

    Thank You !!!
    Michelle Enriquez

    • Hi Michelle Enriquez! I appreciate your comment. In terms of vocabulary, I would try to avoid words like “impairment,” “disorder,” and “disfluency,” and use other words, such as “stutter” or “difference” instead. If there are additional words you are concerned about, then brainstorm alternatives. Ask the client what words they would like to use to describe their voice, and come up with a new vocabulary together. Best of luck!

  7. Hi Adam! I agree with you that words can influence what we think. Particularly negative words can. I know that for myself that I’ve had a hard time forgetting and getting past negative words after they are said. Thank you for reminding us all that we should be careful with our words and that more positive words/phrases should be used when talking about stuttering.

  8. Hi Lexie! I’m sorry to hear that negative words have affected you in the past, but I’m glad you connect with the poem on a personal level. Thanks for reinforcing my message!

  9. Thank you all for reading my poem and participating in the conference! We made our own vital contribution to the representation of stuttering this month, and I enjoyed making connections with other people who stutter and allies. Consider yourself stutterfied!