About the Author: Anita Blom, born and raised in the Netherlands, is living in Sweden. She worked as an operation manager for the Workers’ Educational Association. She has been a board member, incl chairperson, of stuttering organisations on local, national, European and international level, and an advisory board member of several international stuttering organisations.  She was a national and international keynote speaker on stuttering, had her own stuttering consultant company, was one of the Stutter Social hosts, was a project leader of several stuttering projects, and twice Member of the Year. She is an award-winning stuttering activist, acknowledged by Voice Unearthed on the Wall Of Inspiration, Stamma, and many others, nationally and internationally. She was also a leader of national and international camps for children and for young adults who stutter for 30 years.  Anita, aka Scatsis, has stuttered since she was 9 and had a troublesome youth because of her stuttering. She went from being silent, to giving stuttering a voice, from pre-school children to the European Parliament, now inspiring people who stutter of all ages, they can make a difference. Do check out her previous papers to the ISAD online conferences. Due to health issues she now has to take it slow, but is still an inspiration to many, especially young people who stutter and those with ME/cfs. Her device, that’s now been used all over the world is “Sure I stutter. What are you good at?”.

I have been actively involved in the stuttering community for over 30 years, giving numerous presentations, keynotes, and Masterclasses worldwide. I have spoken to audiences ranging from pre-schoolers to the European Parliament. Here are some questions and my responses that highlight the challenges, diversities, and strengths of living with a stutter or clutter. Note that these are my own thoughts and experiences.

Do you stutter when you sing?

No, I don’t, but I know people who stutter (PWS) who do. There is no one-size-fits-all answer (see ISAD online conference 2023). Some therapies involve singing, and for me, singing my words eliminates my stutter. However, would you go to the grocery store, present in school, or attend a job interview and sing? Would that be easier for the listener? We already worry about what people think of our stuttering. Would singing not exacerbate this? Or would it be easier if we just stutter and you simply listen? Don’t offer advice that you wouldn’t follow yourself.

As Speech-Language Pathologists, we no longer know whether to use fluency treatment or acceptance treatment. Do you have advice?

I can only speak for myself, but my best advice is to ask your clients what they want by coming to you. Fluency? (And is 100% fluency achievable?) Acceptance? The courage to speak no matter what? Understanding stuttering? Getting out of a block? Learning to relax muscles to speak with less tension? Do they even want treatment, or just to learn how to explain stuttering to others and feel free to keep calm and stutter on? Is this the client’s wish, or that of society, family, teacher, or employer? Start by asking questions and listening thoroughly to the answers, including what’s not said.

With acceptance as a safety net to fall back on when speaking sometimes is harder than others, to not feel you’ve failed, but just accept that it’s one of those days, and tomorrow try again. Offer a smörgåsbord and be creative.  A mix of unblocking, ACT, theatre, and swimming might be the key. Some SLPs avoid working with PWS, fearing they can’t help making the client fluent. But there is no magic wand. The challenge is to find out what the client wants and needs, and your strength lies in finding the right tools for this individual. Maybe the best treatment is no tools at all for your client, but instead use your tools to strengthen allies.

Why is stuttering a problem? We all stutter sometimes.

Yes, everyone stumbles on words occasionally, but not everyone stutters. For those who stutter a little, the main problem might be societal expectations. For those who stutter a lot, where words take minutes to come out, stuttering can be a significant issue, both mentally (due to societal presumptions and personal frustration) and physically (tension, headaches, even hiccups). Covert stutterers, who try to hide their stutter, face the challenge of weighing every word before speaking.

The major challenge is society’s lack of acceptance. Stuttering is often seen as something to be treated or hidden and (well-meant but not useful) advice is offered. But do we tell a person in a wheelchair to “simply” stand up and walk, as we do so every day and know it works? Or tell a deaf person to get rid of their deafness as it bothers us? Or a blind person to read printed text as they should adapt to society? Instead, we should ask, “What can I do to make it easier for you to talk, as communication is a two-way street?” It’s a huge challenge to get society to see our strengths and capabilities beyond dysfluency. We are strong. We do something tough, still not accepted by society, and yet we talk. That’s strength and determination.

Is stuttering a disability?

No. And yes. If I can stutter freely, it’s not a disability. But when I’m interrupted, hung up on the phone, denied adjustments in school, or a job because I stutter, I am made disabled. Like a person in a wheelchair isn’t disabled until there are stairs and no other way up. Most of us face societal hurdles or self-imposed hurdles striving for “perfection.” But if we don’t use the word “disabled,” how do we get support for discrimination, funding for stutter camps, or school adjustments?

Don’t be afraid to use the word “disabled,” but don’t let it define you. Like others facing challenges, it shows strength. Strength to finish sentences despite interruptions, to confront bullies, to tell teachers what help you need, to tell employers that your stuttering has given you valuable skills like listening, compassion, and patience. Strength to raise awareness, talk about stuttering, and wear that shirt, sea green ribbon or button that shows you stutter.

What can I do to help as a listener?

The famous singer and PWS Scatman John sang, “Stop, look and listen!” Stop focusing on yourself and my stutter, look at me as you would others, and listen to what I’m saying, not how I’m saying it. But we’re all different. So instead of not knowing what to do, ask. Whether you’re a family member, friend, SLP, employer, or teacher, ask. It’s a challenge for the listener to ask, just as it is for us to tell, but it gets the elephant out of the conversation.

That said, it shouldn’t be an obligation to advertise, just as not everyone wants to discuss an operation or divorce. But if stuttering is between me and my listener, it can make conversation easier by simply stating, without apology, that I stutter, and then moving on.

What can I do to help as a parent with a child who stutters?

The best help you can give is to be the wonderful parent you are. Yes, your child stutters, which will cause challenges, but they have many qualities that outnumber stuttering. Ensure your child knows this and keeps talking. Learn more about stuttering. Visit an SLP specializing in stuttering and share your questions and concerns. There is great information for parents from organizations like the NSA, SFA, and STAMMA, and maybe also in your country. Read Dori Holte’s books. Tell family members to let your child speak without judgment or time pressure. Visit a stutter camp. They are amazing for both your child and yourself, creating a safe space to talk, share, and have fun, knowing you’re not alone. Stuttering can be tough sometimes, but PWS are in most walks of life. So keep them talking.

What can I do to help as a teacher with students who stutter?

If you think you don’t have students who stutter, you might have missed something. At least 1% of adults and 4% of children stutter. Many hide it, having learned by society that stuttering should be cured or hidden. Ensure all staff have updated information on stuttering. There’s plenty of free information explaining what stuttering is, how to recognize it, and how to help. Don’t wait for the student to come to you; that might be too big a step. Start by asking how you can help and find strategies together to help the student reach its potential. Make school a safe environment, free from bullying, focusing on the child’s qualities, and empowering them to speak freely and reach their goals. If they don’t know how, there is material available, and PWS might be willing to educate both teachers and students. Use the International Stuttering Awareness Day (ISAD) 22 Oct, and/or the International Day of People With Disabilities (IDPWD) 3 Dec to raise awareness.

What can I do to help as an employer

Keep an open mind. A PWS has learned to cope with challenges and, as a result, has developed qualities that can be an asset to your company. The fact that this individual is applying to work for you, despite knowing it may be difficult to convince you of their qualifications, demonstrates strength and determination. They may have developed important skills such as listening, patience, empathy, and determination, and may have had to excel beyond their peers to prove their capabilities. This person could be the best employee you’ve ever had, not in spite of their stutter, but because of it.

Stuttering can only be measured by stuttered syllables

My pet peeve… How much time do we have to discuss this?? Is my stutter severe when I stutter a lot, and non-existent when I’m covert? Is my stutter cured when I no longer stutter but remain silent? Measurements are necessary to find results, but what if they measured whether a PWS loves talking, is more socially involved, is happy without feeling shame, is pursuing their dream job, no longer has tics, and is more relaxed? Some speech therapists still focus solely on fluency. Some therapies involve parents commenting on their child’s speech, praising fluency, and noting stuttering. What message does this send? That fluency is good and stuttering is bad? That they can’t speak freely and should only use speech techniques? That home is a judgmental environment? As a stutter camp leader for 30+ years, we have to help them rebuild. Both kids who stutter and their parents.

An international stuttering organization chair once told kids they couldn’t be CEOs if they stuttered. This is untrue and devastating to tell a child who stutters to lower his goals and forget about his dreams! I was raised with similar words. I was told not to study, aim for a job, or even a partner because I stuttered. Yet, I was headhunted for most of my jobs, had high-level projects, ran my own company, and became a teacher teaching teachers! So stop with therapies such as TimeOut, Lidcombe and all others where parents are told to become the child’s therapist. Stop with the Samsung watch telling me every time I stutter. Stop with the metronome and other “methods” that turn us into robots, and start measuring our strengths, expanding our comfort zones, and pursuing, and reaching, our dreams. And remember that words matter. Disorder. Cure. Fluency. Recovery. Let’s rewrite the stuttering therapy dictionary NOW.

Keep asking

If you’ve read this far, thank you. I’ve been on a journey from rock bottom to now paying it forward (see my presentations in previous ISAD conferences), a journey that will hopefully lead to a book. So if you want to hear more, contact me, invite me. Free of charge. I have a lot to say that needs to be heard, as long as we’re challenged to “fit in.” My stutter is no longer my challenge; it’s my strength. Or, as my viral quote goes: “Sure I stutter. What are you good at?” And hey, maybe our stuttered speech increases your strength: to become a better listener. 😉