Dealing with Bullying
How can you verbally stand up for yourself? Do you verbally standup for yourself?
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Dealing with Bullying — 3 Comments
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How can you verbally stand up for yourself? Do you verbally standup for yourself?
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Hi,
its hard, really hard and shameful to stand and start speak but it was before.
I had the same problem 8 years back When I wasn’t accepting myself as a PWS (person who stutter) because I used to think, I was the only stutterer in this World and Why God gave this to me.
But after knowing acceptance, I have started taken small steps like advertising my stuttering in-front of class friends, teachers and gradually I started building my confidence that there is no harm to stutter. You can avoid few people who always make fun of your stuttering and see those people, who really happy to see you making a whole sentence and convey what you want to say.
Right now, I am working as Product Designer and having 8 years of experience. I proudly say I am still stuttering but now I am stuttering with confidence and I have no fear at all. I easily verbally standup for anything. I have done many small talk shows, Toastmaster meeting to bravely perform all acts of fun and speaking.
so take your small steps towards acceptance and redefine your stuttering.
I have stuttered all my life but don’t think I have ever been “bullied” once. Being the subject of bullying says more about the other person that you. It generally indicates that the other person has a personality deficit rather than you. Having said that we can make our self the subject “bullying” by responding to this behaviour in a the way that the bully hopes you will react and that is negatively. Right through my life, especially in my childhood and teens I was basically a happy and confident child with a good sense of humour despite my stutter. Try using a sense of humour to disarm the bully. You must remember that stuttering does not need to define who you are. It is just something that you do not something that you are. Everyone has a personal problem (including the bully) it is just that yours may be more obvious to the world. It does not make you a lesser person. Talk about it, laugh about it and lighten up. Make friends with the person who is acting like a bully and he may become a good friend. Just don’t behave like a victim or you are likely to become the target of more bullying. Just my thoughts. Good luck, it too will pass.
I was bullied till the edge (see my paper for this year’s ISAD https://isad.live/isad-2020/papers-presented-by/stories-and-experiences-with-stuttering-by-pws/there-are-no-failures-just-life-lessons-anita-blom/)
I didn’t speak up for myself, as when many people say negative things, you start to believe it. However, after realizing I’m OK just the way I am, I started to claim my space. I don’t let people interrupt me, hang up the phone or fill in my words, as that’s plain rude. Because it’s hard to speak sometimes, the words that come out should be respected. And what I say is worth repeating. We also need to give kids the tools to stand up for themselves and to have a reply for bullies. F ex “you can try and imitate me, but I’ll always be the best at stuttering”, or wear t-shirts and buttons to show stuttering is ok. And we who are “out in the open” can help to speak in schools and in different media and give stuttering a face and a voice.
Stay safe and keep them talking
Anita